i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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