Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(402): View more from Nebraska

she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.

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(206): View more from Washington

Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.

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(225): View more from Louisiana

i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels

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(239): View more from Florida

At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself

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(817): View more from Texas

New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.

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(901): View more from Tennessee

we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever

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(631): View more from New York

when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter

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