i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
