Who did Billy Mays play for?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
