You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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