hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize