You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
