I just cut my nipple shaving
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
