i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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