I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
