ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
