Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize