I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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