Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
