I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
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