Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
