i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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