lets start a swedish sibling band together
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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