I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
