I didn't shave. On purpose
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
