We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
How does one acquire holy water?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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