try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
