Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
