Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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