Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize