And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
