i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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