it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize