no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
