Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
