So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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