More tranny stories later!
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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