My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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