Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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