it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize
