im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
