I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
zippers are such a cool invention
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
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