i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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