I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
