you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
