she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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