so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize