why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
