remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
His hands were made for my vagina.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Randomize
