i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
