Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Randomize
