I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
NoShamevember. You game?
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
You pole danced in your parka.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Randomize
