Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
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