Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
