At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Where is the hickey?
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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