So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
he puts the penis in happiness.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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