I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
