Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
